Wednesday, July 29, 2009


Move over Twitter, your day is over.

Introducing: Jitter, the newest Internet instant ego-casting device. Jitter does Twitter one better. Instead of bogging down with words. Jitter allows anytime, anywhere emotivism through state-of-the art emoticons!

Jitter reads sounds you make into your Blue Tooth and translates them into strings of moving, multi-color, evolving emoticons. So, if you are cut off in traffic and utter a sign or groan or blast of outrage, jitter translates this into the appropriate emotion string to all your JitterConnections. If you yawn, Jitter is there, and will find the emoticon to best capture this precious moment of your autobiography for all to experience. If you laugh, the world laughs with you--through Jitter!

Any acoustic blast emanating from your mouth is translated instantly into emoti-mania for the jittering masses. And you have access to the ego-casting of endless others throught the JitterEye mini-screen that attaches to your Blue Tooth. Your Jitterisms can also be seen on iPhones, Blackberries, on anything that receives data!

This makes LSD look like 3.2% beer. It will connect our psyches, transform our culture, cure our loneliness, fill the howling void in our souls. And more, always more.

Jitter is word-free--beyond text. Words take too long to write and read and just get in the way. Jitter is the new way to spray the world with your viscera virtually. Text-less, word-less--join the JitterWorld. Now.


Yossman said...

wonderful ,uh, I mean ;-)

pgepps said...

I'm pretty sure these guys are going to come after you with an IP suit when this goes to market: